Jesus sets IT manager free from nightmares
W had been enthusiastically learning about God after she accepted Christ at an Alpha course nearly two years earlier, but spiritual joy and freedom kept eluding her. Here is her story of finally being able to draw close to her Heavenly Father after cutting all ties with the Hindu spirits that oppressed her through her past involvement in yoga. Praise God!
I used to wonder why God wouldn’t just give me a beautiful life after I accepted Christ. I finally know why.
It was at my usual bible study meeting that our study leader came to pray for us, one by one. As she came closer, I started getting goosebumps and they became stronger and stronger. As she prayed for me, I felt something unseen leave me like “smoke” or “steam” and the goosebumps stopped. She also told me that she sensed the Lord was giving me “a new song”. I didn’t know how to make sense of it all and just kept quiet.
The following week wasn’t easy for me. I had many devilish nightmares. In one recurring nightmare, I kept seeing my fiancé, who is Christian, come to kill me at my home. Many of my nightmares have been about bloody murders.
When I mentioned this to my study leader, she said that she also experienced some unusual spiritual attacks in the same week and that she had felt exhausted after our last prayer time – as if she has just been through a battle. I instantly knew that it was probably me who triggered that. A small inner voice told me to tell her about my experience the week before and to ask for help in deliverance.
This wasn’t the first time I have asked for deliverance prayers.
My previous deliverance encounter was an impromptu session with a church pastor. We dealt mainly with spirits that I had built strong attachments to; namely Laughing Buddha with many children, Four-faced Buddha, a Taoist’s magical yellow paper talisman I had kept under my bed as well as a spirit called Abandonment.
But I always thought there must still be some unclean things inside me because:
- I didn’t feel connected to the Holy Spirit.
- When I prayed, I either fell asleep or couldn’t focus.
- Sometimes during quiet time, I would “remember” scenes that were clearly not from my own life. That was the scariest part because I wasn’t sure how that happened and who had control over my mind.
- I couldn’t put my heart into reading the Bible.
- I couldn’t relate to or remember God’s Word after reading it.
- I thought badly of people.
- I got agitated easily and I couldn’t let go of anger.
- I couldn’t feel the joy of the Lord.
- Christianity became just head knowledge.
- I still sensed the presence of evil spirits in my life.
My study leader asked me to go on a fast and complete a form with many questions about my family and my past. This time, preparation for the deliverance took a lot more effort. To be honest, it was not easy to find the answers to all the questions, some required me to go into some deep and dark places which I had purposely sealed up.
Finding things which I had put in a “locked box” for years was painful. I wanted to give up many times but God helped me to press on.
I was also sceptical about fasting at first. I never understood the relationship between fasting and relying on God. So I quickly finished reading a small book about fasting to understand the scriptures on why and how I should fast. Then I fasted from lunch and used that time to pray. I found spending time with God was really good. I wanted to read more and more of God’s Word; it had become food to my soul.
There wasn’t much revelation during the first few days of my fast, but the night before my deliverance was amazing. I woke up in the middle of the night and everything that I didn’t know and couldn’t ever humanly know was revealed. It was like watching a movie with lots of flashbacks. All the dots were connected and it was just crystal clear.
One of the things the Holy Spirit revealed was that the wife of a man I once had a relationship with had placed a curse on me.
She practised Hinduism. After the curse was placed on me, I suffered sharp shoulder pain and turned to yoga to reduce the pain. I now believe that the spirits of Hinduism had used yoga to take control of my life, so I would always praise their false gods through my chants and yoga poses.
I practised yoga for years before I became a Christian. I was even a certified yoga instructor. My life revolved around yoga. I always felt good doing yoga and then felt empty afterwards, so I kept going back. All I talked about was yoga. I thought about yoga all the time.
I had been under a form of bondage to Hindu spirits through yoga.
I realise now that I used to attract and be attracted to Hindu men during that time. When I stopped yoga, the attraction seemed to disappear. When I meditated during yoga and fell into a sleep-like trance, my mind would travel to crazy spiritual places. That opened my subconscious mind to demonic Hindu spirits that were now trying to block my relationship with God.
The Holy Spirit also reminded me that God wanted to give me a “new song” and that He had told me to read Psalm 56 on the way to work one day, just as I was feeling physically and mentally drained and was losing strength. When I opened the Bible to read Psalm 56, I thought, “this is exactly how I feel right now!” Aha, my new song was Psalm 56.
All the answers came to me after I persevered in fasting.
When I arrived for the deliverance session, I felt so much sadness and sorrow inside of me – similar to my last deliverance encounter. It felt like I was sending someone very close off at the airport and I would never meet him or her again. (My prayer counsellors later explained that this was just the “separation anxiety” and reaction from the demonic spirits when they realised Jesus was about to set me free.)
Seeing how upset I was, my study leader gently accompanied me to a private room with two other prayer counsellors, and told me that they cared for and loved me. She then explained the rundown, and that I needed to be absolutely true to my feelings and tell them every little thing I was feeling.
We prayed over many, many things, including some sins that I felt too unworthy to ask for forgiveness for in the past. I confessed, repented, cast out evil spirits, cut off ungodly soul ties with people and places, and broke the curse over me.
As soon as we started to cancel out the curse, my head felt so heavy that I had to bow my head down.
And as they led me word by word to cancel out the curse in Jesus’ name, I felt like I was coming off a rocky boat ride. Something from my body needed to come out. The next thing I knew, I threw up. I could hear the prayer counsellors praying over me but I couldn’t hear what they were saying. The more they prayed, the more I threw up.
And it was not the normal vomit from your gut. It was odourless, tasteless, colourless and bubbly. And interestingly, there was no after-taste. At the end of all that puking, I just felt light and joyful.
Whatever was trying to stop me from praying was no longer there to weigh me down. I felt like a weightless feather!
Some other physical manifestations I experienced during the three hours we prayed together include:
- I started feeling dizzy as soon as we started praying. Everything around me was like a merry-go-round.
- I heard everything clearly, but I couldn’t repeat the simple prayers I was taught to pray. I had to be led word-by-word many times; I just couldn’t remember the words or I would miss or mix them up.
- I either mispronounced or couldn’t pronounce simple words.
- I missed including “In Jesus’ name” everywhere.
- I had massive headaches. It felt like my head was going to explode.
- I felt like multiple needles were poking my eyes and couldn’t open my eyes to read scripture.
- I couldn’t control my emotions. I cried hard, like a baby, especially when I had to send the different yoga spirits out in Jesus’ name.
- I hesitated to ask for forgiveness for myself and receive God’s forgiveness. I felt shameful and dirty.
I am thankful that God gave me this experience. He has taught me that the spiritual world is real – and that He is awesome. Spiritual attacks come in all forms and the Word of God is our weapon. Our human minds are the biggest block. And fasting is biblical.
Everyone can and should enjoy freedom. No one should live with Satan’s lies.
God knows me and He knows me intimately. He knows I can only remember and appreciate things through experiences. I can boldly tell others that God is real because I personally experienced His goodness. It’s not just from learning through Sunday sermons, books or people. The evidence is from my own experience.
My nightmares have also reduced to almost nothing. And I am no longer bothered by them.
The way I feel now is like a cleaned coffee glass. I feel that God took a clean cloth and wiped all the coffee stains inside me. And I am now transparent. I can see my identity and purpose in Christ so clearly. I am thankful and blessed, and I need to share what God gave me to others.
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