Jesus delivers retiree from pride
D had been a Christian for decades but it wasn’t until some financial difficulties that he learnt the importance of putting down his pride and submitting to God. Here is his testimony of recognising the root of his pride and being healed of neck-ache. Praise God!
For nearly 50 years of my life, I thought I had been a good Christian.
I was born and raised in a Christian family in Hong Kong, and received the Lord as my Saviour. At age 19, I went through church confirmation and baptism. Church was a second home to my other siblings and me. We attended church regularly. I sang in the youth choir, was a Sunday school teacher, participated in summer camps and winter retreats.
Thirty years ago, I immigrated to Canada with my young family at age 37. Life has had its ups and downs, but the past 10 years have been the hardest. I trusted a friend who deceived and defrauded me in a multi-million dollar business partnership. He even tried to sue me in court to force me to proceed on an agreement that I later found out was technically illegal and that I wanted to back out of. After enlisting my own lawyers and months of negotiations, we finally reached an out-of-court settlement.
Subsequently, l suffered a huge financial loss prior to the completion of the business deal.
All through those troubles, I was insecure and fearful. Feeling so helpless and defeated, I had no peace of mind for years. In my agony, I had been unable to sleep. The business deal dominated my thoughts and my prayers to God for justice and guidance seemed to go nowhere. I felt overwhelmed and needed to be delivered from my struggles.
Eventually, I came to realise that it was my own pride that subconsciously prompted me to do things my own way, with my own abilities.
I had refused to obey God and turned myself into my own god.
At that moment, I made a conscious choice to restore my personal relationship with God by submitting to Him. God used the circumstances of my struggles to bring me to a place of brokenness, repentance and surrender.
Last year, I got baptised again.
I realised that I did not have a proper understanding of its spiritual significance the first time I got baptised. To me, it was just like a tradition and formality. This time, I repented and confessed my sins. Thank God I physically felt a great relief afterward. When I came out of the water, as my sins were washed away by God’s grace, I received eternal life through the Holy Spirit.
After baptism, I was given some reading materials, paving the way for a renewal prayer session. I learnt about the spiritual warfare between God’s eternal Kingdom and Satan’s domain on earth. I realized that curses can be powerful.
I knew that I had to be still and humble in order for my soul to experience God.
During preparation for renewal prayer, I fasted, prayed and invited the Holy Spirit to guide me and reveal my sins, the sins of my ancestors, and the people I needed to forgive.
During my prayer session, my prayer counselors, through the Holy Spirit, revealed that a spirit of shame had caused me to develop a habit of self-reliance and independence.
The first time I experienced shame, I was very young.
With long tiring hours at work and seven children to take care of, my father would get mad at me whenever I could not understand his repeated explanations for my arithmetic homework. This happened lots of times. I felt shameful of my stupidity and would walk away crying. It hurt.
So I tried not to ask for help with homework in the fear that I would be yelled at and be shamed again by my father. My father passed away 18 years ago but this shame had stayed with me.
Over time, I developed a habit of not asking for help and became self-dependent.
Instead of seeking God first and asking for His will in dealing with all aspects of my life, my pride pulled me away from Him. It was my self will against God’s will.
My prayer counselors asked me to start with praying to forgive my father and then to repent of my sinful pride which caused me to rely on myself and not to put God first.
Then I was led to pray to release myself from past contacts with any occult practices and cut off ungodly soul ties with their practitioners. This included qigong and martial arts masters, fortune tellers, and a psychic.
One thing the Holy Spirit revealed was the stronghold of Tibetan Buddhist chants over me.
I had never been involved with that branch of Buddhism, but I did remember that I used to visit a Chinese chiropractor for treatment for back and knee pain. He played Buddhist chants all day long at his treatment centre. As I prayed to break ties with and rebuke any spirits that spoke over me through those chants, my mind cleared and I suddenly recalled seeing posters of Tibetan temples and monks on the walls in that Chinese chiropractic centre! Praise God that He revealed this to me.
I was also asked to forgive myself and people who had offended or done me wrong. Furthermore, I prayed for God’s forgiveness for cursing others. For those I had cursed, I prayed for God’s blessings upon them.
I had a very good night’s sleep after the renewal prayer, better than I had slept for years.
Waking up the next morning, I felt relieved and the long-term soreness of my neck was gone. This uncomfortable tightness in my neck had been bothering me for years, and I had learnt to live with it. Thank God the soreness is now gone and I can feel easy and brighter.
Today, I believe I have restored my personal relationship with God by walking in His Light.
1 John 1:7 ” But if we walk in the light as He is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, his son, purifies us from all sins. ”
When we call out to God for His help when we face struggles, we may not easily see His grace. Looking back in hindsight now, I can clearly see God’s work in my whole life. He is a good Father and I can be thankful in all circumstances. God is great. Praise be to the Lord.
I Thessalonians 5:17 “Be joyful always. Never stop praying. Be thankful in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you who belong to Christ Jesus “
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